An Associate Rabbi in the Life of the Mac-Attack

I came into work today and saw that my dad was pacing around his office.

"Hey, Dad, I--"
"Hold all my calls."

He was sweating with a familiar shortness of breath. I urged him to sit down.

"You should sit down, Dad."

"Can you get me a glass of water?"
"Right away."


I came back a minute later with a glass of water for him.

"What's going on?"
"Today is the first board meeting of the fiscal year. They're voting on the decision to add an associate rabbi. I really don't want an associate rabbi, Michael."
"Well, it may relieve some stress and--"
"It's causing the stress! Look at me; I'm bathing in my own bodily fluids!"
"Yeah, you really should think about getting some better deoderent."
"Michael, I'm serious. I need you to be at the board meeting."
"But I'm not on the board."
"You're the USY President."
"That really has no meaning by synagogue board standards."
"Son, I really need you to be there. Someone needs to have my back in there. I can't face the board alone."
"Dad, I'm not really comfortable going to a board meeting."


TEN MINUTES LATER



"This board meeting will now come to order."

Mr. Jerry Sternberg, the President of Temple Beth Zion, was ready to begin the very important board meeting.

"First off, I'd like to welcome you all to the first board meeting of the fiscal year. I hope you all had a great New Years Eve and Day. Now, let's begin."

There was some applause from the rest of the board.

"I can't believe I actually came," I whispered to my dad.
"Your presence is greatly appreciated."

On that note, Mr. Sternberg continued.

"Now, I'm sure you've all heard the recent rumors surrounding the possibility of an associate rabbi to assist Rabbi Maccabbi. Well, those rumors are indeed true. I'd like you all to please welcome Rabbi Joseph Moon."

There was some applause as a very young and very tall Jew entered to meeting room.

"Thank you for having me."

Rabbi Moon took a seat next to where Mr. Sternberg was standing.

"Rabbi Moon has been a rabbi for a year now. He was most recently the education director at Torah Orah Synagogue in Atlanta, Georgia. I feel that he would be a great addition to our family here at Temple Beth Zion."

Mrs. Rosenthal, the Treasurer, raised her hand.

"You had a question or comment, Ruth?"
"Yes, Jerry. It's just that Rabbi Moon is so very young."
"And you're so very old, Ruth!"

Mr. Horowitz, the Executive Vice President, was known for his rude, unneeded comments.

"Nobody asked you, Arthur."
"I think we should let the Rabbi speak," said Mr. Goldfarb, the Secretary.
"I think that's an excellent idea, Herbert. Rabbi Moon, would you care to--"
"I meant Rabbi Maccabbi."

Everyone began to talk amongst themselves.

"May I, Jerry?"
"By all means, Rabbi."

My dad stood up and addressed the board.

"With all due respect to Rabbi Moon, I really feel I must give my opinion on this whole situation. I know that many of you are concerned about my health, but my heart attack was in August. I've made a full recovery and I'm feeling just fine. When Rabbi Barnes retired two years ago, he made it very clear that he wanted me, and only me, to be his successor. I can do this on my own. In the four months since my heart attack, have you seen me struggle even once?"

There was some talking amongst the board members.

"Rabbi Maccabbi, we are all aware of the fact that you can handle it alone. But why would you want to? Your job description requires much more than just leading a service and giving a great sermon. There's hospital visits, social events, administrative responsibilities; do you really want to be taking on all these obligations by yourself?"
"I've been just fine since I took over last year. Have you heard anyone complain? I sure haven't."
"No one is complaining, Rabbi. They're concerned--we're concerned. You're 55 years old, and while you haven't been our rabbi for very long, I'm sure that you'll be looking to retire in the next ten years. Don't you want to have the luxury of already having a successor?"
"Who said anything about retiring, Jerry? I may be in my mid-fifties, but when I'm on that bima, I feel like I could be a teenager again."
"Here's another thing to think about, Rabbi; this is an opportunity to teach. Rabbi Moon can learn from you. In fact, he may be able to teach you something."
"I teach everyday, Jerry. And I learn from people everyday. I'm a rabbi; it's what I do."

The banter continued for quite a while. It was becoming unbearable.

"Excuse me, Rabbi, but may I just say something?"

Suddenly, everything went silent as Rabbi Moon awaited his answer.

"Fine. Speak."

I was incredibly surprised at how calm my father was being. Up until that moment, it was as if my father was a U.S. Senator in the middle of filibusting a corrupt legislative bill.

"I know I'm young and I have a lot to learn. That's why I wanted to work under you. You see, three years ago, when I was in Rabbinical School, I attended your lecture in Los Angeles."

I remembered that lecture. It was shortly after he got out of the hopsital and made the decision to pursue Rabbinical studies that he was asked to give a series of lectures at colleges on the west coast.

"I was so moved by your experience that I hoped I could someday work under you. When you became the rabbi last year, there were no job openings, so I went back to my hometown of Atlanta to become the rabbi at the synagogue I grew up in. Atlanta's a nice place, and the shul was great, but when I saw that there was a possible opportunity to work with you, I just knew that I had to jump at the chance. Your lecture changed my life, Rabbi Maccabbi, and I know that I can learn a lot from someone with your level of knowledge and life experience."

Everybody in the room was moved by Rabbi Moon's story. To be honest, I didn't realize that anyone would've been moved by my father's lectures, but then again, I'd heard the story a hundred times.

Everyone was waiting for my father to say something.

"Um, Rabbi Maccabbi, do you have anything more to say before the vote."
"I have no further protest. Thank you for your kind words, Rabbi Moon."

My dad sat back down next to me. He was sweating even more than he had been while we were in his office earlier. He was obviously worn out and didn't have much fight left in him. On the other hand, it was possible that Rabbi Moon's incredible respect for him swayed his opinion and moved him more than he would have ever thought possible.

"If there are no further comments, we will now be doing the voting. Ethel, if you'll please pass out the ballots."

Mrs. Ethel Stevens, the Chairwoman of the Events Committee, passed around ballots to everyone except for my father and myself.

It was only ten minutes before all the ballots were in, but it felt like a lot longer. After the ballots were in, Mr. Goldfarb counted the votes. This, too, took a while. I was on the edge of my seat, as was my father. I'd seen him become stressed before, but never as stressed as he was this very minute. He was almost shaking.

"The ballots have been counted."
"The results please, Herbert."

Mr. Goldfarb read the results.

"On behalf of the entire congregation at Temple Beth Zion, the board has voted in favor of the motion to hire Rabbi Joseph Moon as the Associate Rabbi under Rabbi Albert C. Maccabbi."
"Meeting is adjourned."

There was a huge roar of applause from the entire board as Rabbi Moon stood up with pride. My father got up from his seat and shook Rabbi Moon's hand. It could've been determined as one of two things: accepting defeat or welcoming in a new opportunity.

It was hard to tell exactly what was going through his mind when he shook the young rabbi's hand. He didn't say much when we got back to the office.

"So, you've got a new apprentice."
"It would seem that way."

There was a pause.

"Thank you for coming to the meeting with me. I couldn't have done what I did without you."
"Argue with the president about how things should be at the synagogue? You do that on a daily basis."
"Very funny."

He reached into his pocket and gave me a 20.

"Consider this your bonus for helping me out in there."
"But I didn't do anything in there."
"Sure you did. Because you were in there, I felt that there was someone who was legitimately on my side. Like I said earlier, I really needed you in there today."

He hugged me.

"Use the 20 for yourself. In fact, why don't you call up Melinda and take her out for pizza?"
"Are you okay to drive? You seem exhausted."

He laughed.

"I think I'll manage just fine, thank you."

He looked at me.

"I'm very proud of you--for everything."
"Thanks, Dad."
"Especially in the last couple weeks. With you getting into Florida and going into the meeting with me. I am very happy to be your father, and I always have. You're gonna be graduating from high school in just five months; enjoy your time, especially with Melinda. Have fun for as long as you can."
"Does that mean I don't have a curfew tonight?"
"Let's not push it."

Following my dad's advice, I called up Melinda and told her to meet me at By the Slice. Half an hour later, we were sitting down in the home of the best pizza in Phoenix. It was good to be out with her.

"So he was really that drained of energy?"
"I haven't seen him look so weak since he was recovering from the heart attack. It was like he was Rocky and he had no fight left in him."
"How's he feeling about this whole associate rabbi thing?"
"Well, he was really stressed about it, but after he heard this guy's story, he seemed almost moved. I think he's okay with it now."
"Well, I hope he's okay. Your dad is a great rabbi; I'd hate to see someone else stealing his thunder."
"I think it'll be fine. I'm interested to see how this all plays out."

At that moment, our pizza was brought to our table. I immediately grabbed a slice and took a bite.

"You know, it just hit me."
"What just hit you?"
"I'm gonna miss this old pizza joint. A lot of great memories in here."

Melinda didn't say anything, and I realized it was probably stupid to say what I just said. The fact that I was going 2000 miles away for school had become a sore subject recently.

"Anyways, how was your day?"
"Michael, I've been thinking."
"That's never a good way to start off a story."

She ignored the comment and continued.

"With you going off the Florida and all, I think we should give ourselves a deadline."
"A deadline?"
"Yeah. A lot of couples do it. I hear it takes a lot of the stress away."
"What exactly does it mean to give ourselves a deadline?"
"What it means is that we need to come up with a date for when we break up."
"We really have to discuss this right now?"
"Michael, I love you, but this isn't going to work while you're in Florida. I think that this is the right thing to do."

I was becoming a little confused.

"Whatever happened to not worrying about it? I thought that would work."
"Maybe for you, but it won't work for me."
"Why? Why won't it work for you?"
"You know me; I need to know what to expect."
"What's the fun in that?"
"I don't think that there's much fun involved in being on edge and worrying about whether or not we're gonna stay together. If we make the decision to break up by a certain time, than we'll be able to just enjoy the rest of our time together without any stress."
"Without any stress? You don't think it's gonna be stressful when it gets closer to our 'deadline'?"
"By that time, we'll be ready."
"Ready for what? To break up and move on with our lives? I don't know if I'll be ready to let you go in 3 months, four months, or even five. I love you, Melinda."
"I love you too, but you need to understand."
"Understand what?"
"Understand that, realistically, we're not gonna last. I don't wanna get hurt, Michael."
"Yeah, neither do I."

I paused.

"Which is why I'm thinking that we should break up now."
"Now?"
"Yeah. You don't wanna get hurt and neither do I. You say we're not gonna last; why put off the inevitable?"

At that moment, the check came to our table and I put the 20 down.

"I'm out of here. Let the waitress know that she can keep the change."

I got up from the table.

"Michael--"
"Goodbye, Melinda. I'll see you around."

I walked out of By the Slice with my head down, trying to process what had just happened. I had just ended the relationship that I hoped would never end. The minute I broke up with Melinda, I loved her as much as I always had. I wasn't sure that anything for the rest of my life would hurt as much as what I had just done.

They say that all good things must come to an end. Sometimes, the great things end long before you hope they do. However, when it came to my relationship with Melinda, I just wished that it didn't have to end at all.

Sincerely,
Mac-Attack